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【How to】 Grab Breast

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6) Check in before you bounce, jiggle, honk, or slap

Not everyone is into rougher breast play, but some people are! If you and your partner are both into slapping breasts, honking them, jiggling them, or even biting them, that’s completely normal and OK. Just be sure you ask first and communicate before jumping in and doing whatever you want (this goes for any sexual activity, BTW.) If you’re unsure how they’re feeling about something during sex, just say, “Is it OK if I do X?” or “Would you like it if I did X Thing?” Use your words to ensure everyone is down to clown in Tittie Town.

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4) Get your mouth involvedbut be gentle

If your partner seems to be enjoying things, use your tongue to very lightly draw circles around their nipple. If their nipple is erect, gently flick it with your tongue a few times before slowly and gently taking the nipple into your mouth. Alternate between licking and sucking on the nipple. (If your partner has inverted nipples, which approximately 10 to 20% of women do, you can lure the nipples out with touching, kissing, licking, and gentle sucking, but you might have to work a little harder.)

After a while, you can give your mouth a break and go back to gently circling and stroking their nipples—they might enjoy the varying pressure.

Troubleshooting Common Breast Weaning Roadblocks

Although stopping breastfeeding can be as easy as I just made it sound, sometime parents hit some roadblocks. I’m going to run through some common ones to help you troubleshoot. With all of the suggestions below, know that it’s important to stay consistent and keep trying. All of my boys ended up loving cow’s milk, but it took a month or so before they were drinking it really well, usually by the time they were completely weaned from the breast. Keep in mind that once a baby turns 1, they only require 16 ounces of a milk source.

  • Refuses a cup of any type:
      • Try and try again – every day, at every meal, put the milk in the cup and don’t pressure them. Offer it and even demonstrate, but don’t force. You can experiment with serving cold and warm if you like. If your toddler spits it out, that’s okay, it’s all part of the process.
      • Try pumped milk – if you are willing and able, pump and offer that milk in the cup. It will seem foreign and some will likely be wasted, but some babies do better with the familiar taste.
      • Focus on 2-3 different types of cups – cycle through a few different kinds of cups, maybe some with bright colors or a silly character on it.
      • Water in a cup during the day – always have the water in a cup throughout the day. Give it to them in the car, in the bath, outside, wherever.
  • Nursing to sleep:
      • Change up the routine (as described in the previous section)
      • Transitional object – if your child doesn’t already have a special object like a stuffed animal or blanket, start encouraging one. Give it to them every time you are nursing, put it in their arms when you lie them down. Every time.
      • Well-fed – I don’t want you to overly worry about this, so many parents do naturally, but it will give you peace of mind in knowing that their tummy is full. Serve a later dinner that is a favorite or a bedtime snack, where you can give milk in a cup. Knowing their well-fed will help you feel better if they protest a little and they will be less likely to request nursing.
  • Crying:
      • Distract – while I urge you to not push your baby too fast, some will protest a little. This is when you’ll want to change gears and do something really exciting. I remember with my oldest, I always used to feed him on the couch in the middle of the day and I’d rearrange the pillows to support my arm. In the process of weaning, I started to do that just to straighten up and he saw me and thought it was time to nurse. He didn’t cry, but I quickly grabbed him and stood up, saying, “Oh my goodness, did you just hear that car go by?” We went over to the window to have a look and he forgot about it in a second.
      • Offer another drink – without making to big of a deal about it, provide a drink instead, “Oh, here’s your water.” Notice, I didn’t ask, I just made a statement.
      • Cuddles – give lots of these at other times, so they feel that connection with you still.

Tips for success

    • Don’t feel rushed, watch for your child’s acceptance and adjustment.
    • You may be emotional, this is normal. Make sure you are feeling comfortable with your decision.
    • Don’t listen to other people’s opinions.

Did I miss anything? Let me know in the comments, I’ll be happy to answer. And if you’ve been through this before, share your tips, it will be helpful to everyone that stops here.

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Alisha Grogan is a licensed occupational therapist

Alisha Grogan is a licensed occupational therapist and founder of Your Kid’s Table. She has over 15 years experience with expertise in sensory processing and feeding development in babies, toddlers, and children. Alisha also has 3 boys of her own at home. Learn more about her here.

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